I believe and follow Jesus but have doubts in his, and our, bodily resurrection. Can I still call myself a Christian?
Yes you can, and moreover you would be in good company! Resurrection is no small pill to swallow. It flies in the face of everything we know about physics, biology and chemistry. How can cells that have disintegrated be brought back to life? A human body decays, turns to dust and is eventually absorbed into the earth to become food for plants and the on-going march of nature. How could our resurrection be “bodily” after the scattering of all these molecules?
I can think of no other doctrine that has been met with more opposition and “spiritualizing,” and yet, our church’s teaching remains constant; At the end of time, we WILL be raised bodily. Now what form this body will take and actually look like? This we don’t know. Our catechism says that the HOW of our resurrection far exceeds our imagination and understanding.
I learned a little about St. Christopher at our recent “Favorite Saints Wax Museum.” Faith in God apparently did not come easy for him, so he lived a majority of his life as an agnostic, unable to believe in anything beyond what he could physically see, feel, and touch.
Nonetheless, he embraced Jesus’ call to love and serve others. He became a ferryboat operator and spent his life helping to carrying people across a very dangerous stretch of river. Our legend holds that one night a terrible storm arose and the ferryboat capsized. Brave Christopher dove into the dark waters to rescue a child and while carrying that child to the shore, he looked into its face and saw the face of Christ. After that he believed. Fact or fiction? No matter. The story teaches us a very practical and profound lesson. What are we to do when our faith is weak? Live as honestly as we can and use our gifts to help others – and God will make himself known to us.
Remember too St. Thomas who said “I won’t believe until I can touch the holes in his hands and side!” Jesus doesn’t resist or scold him for his doubt, but rather invites him to “Come here. Place your finger my wounds. See for yourself that I am real and not a ghost.”
Fr. Ron Rolheiser says “Skepticism and agnosticism, even atheism, are not a problem as long as one is honest, non-rationalizing, non-lying, ready to efface oneself before reality as it appears, and generous in giving his or her life away in service. If these conditions are met, God will eventually become evident, even to those who need physical proof. God is neither angered nor threatened by an honest agnosticism.”
Ultimately we are bid to acknowledge and accept that the God of love who created the universe is way beyond our understanding. We are like ants being invited to contemplate Astrophysics. Full comprehension just ain’t happening! We will never understand how or what our glorified bodies will be or look this side of the grave.
As Paul Tillich says “The opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty.” Perhaps our prayer can be that of the father of the child Jesus healed in Mark 9:24 who exclaims “Oh Lord, I do believe, but help my unbelief!” and trust that at some point God will appear as we need him to be and will invite us to “touch his wounds so we may believe.”
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